pointofhonoria | come sail away inbox

Crabb is up right now, it's become one of those nights where sleep feels just a little bit too like the Nothing. As weird texts from Erin go, this one is... it's pretty adorable, actually. Her all gushy.

Erin, and I say this with all affection: what in God's name.

Don't worry, I didn't hate Cassandra. And I don't think she hated me. Most awkward introduction I think I've had on the ship besides, y'know, actually dying as my first encounter with someone, but we sorta figured it out. She seems alright.

You really do have it bad though you're right.

I really hope she likes me back she is still figuring that out and I keep thinking maybe I am coming on too strong but like I do have to trust her to tell me if I am right? But God. I need a suit of shining armor or possibly a motorcycle. Wait I am fucking blind. Scratch the motorcycle maybe I can build a horse. Yes. Better plan. Thorn wood and moonlight and song should be a good horse shaped mount and then I can really see how the other half lives with knights without turning myself into roadkill. I will head home from the bar soon I just gotta tone down the feelings a bit there were many feelings and they all want my attention and I do not have that much attention but I thought you needed to know and would like to know and she really is so cuddly it is a different cuddle than your cuddle but all cuddles good. Possibly should not have done long island ice teas back to back.

In what is clearly Erin forgetting the text to speech is still going: Old fashioned please I have the madness of love and need to trade it for factory standard madness thank you mister ghost ah shit this is still on send send -

It sends.

Oh no how is her tall, deadly girlfriend so goddamn cute, help...

I know better than to question the idea of building a horse by now but look, hey, so long as she knows sue can tell you to tone it down then yeah, trust her. You do with me, right, so yeah, give her the same courtesy of assuming she at least knows when she wants something to stop even if the rest is complicated.

And please make that 'soon', well, soon, okay? Be careful with my girlfriend over there, I like her in one piece and not too alcohol poisoned.

But, yeah. Thank you for telling me. And for giving me a good smile while I'm laid here all unable to get off.

....she's from before that could sound like anything but sleep related, right now, alright.

Oh god I interrupted pleasure time to talk about someone else I am so sorry. Uh. I can stop. Unless this is helping? Is Cass your type enough for this to be helping?

Crabb goes through every stage of confusion all the way through to embarrassment in record time for someone tired enough that connecting dots like this should be a struggle.

Wait wait wait what?

Oh wait you mean like

No no no that's not what's happening christ I'm trying to sleep what the hell did I say to give that impression? Is this drunk you or tired me?

Love you said you were trying to get off. If a tall person did not put you somewhere very high that I have to save you from that means trying to cum. Are you not trying to cum so you can get to sleep? Is that not what is happening? Wow I should not be saying that out loud in this bar oops.

Jeezus no I was talking about getting off to sleep, what in god's name since when did that mean THAT?

God please if someone hears you and realises who you're talking to I might die right here. Less blatant words at least christ.

Okay okay but good news the bar is empty. Still gonna think about it though. It is a good thought it goes well with this last drink.

Erin. Erin. Erin. You are killing me here.

Now she's thinking about Erin thinking about it so it's either a very good or bad thing that Erin can't hear the whinier version of that sentiment that exists out loud in her room right now. She might be able to guess though...

I cannot tease with this fucking robot voice but you did not answer the question about if Cass is helpful for that or not.

At the bar Erin is nursing her drink slowly because her attention is on the phone like it is the FINEST audio drama.

Out loud as she becomes a boiled crab: "Oh my God ERIN—"

In text:

How am I supposed to answer that I've met the chick once!

Unsent but almost typed: how am I supposed to know I still have NO direct frame of reference here.

Okay okay see okay see here is what you do okay you do what my dreams have been doing and imagine the two of you playing strip chess and if that does it for you she might be your type. I have run out of alcohol.

That's what your dreams have been doing? Y'know I can't tell if that's tamer than I reckoned or not but jeezus christ.

If I do that I will just get flustered to hell and back and there won't be an answer anyway!

And good, no ordering more.

Okay love I will go home now and pass out and probably dream of watching you two play that more it would be very sexy and also nice. Good luck getting off I love you.

One day I'm gonna find a way to get you back for how easily you kill me over and over again, I love you but christ, Erin. Enjoy your dreams.

When she's more awake she may actually connect some of the missing dots here, like that it's strip chess of all things, but right now she is so tired, flustered, and really trying to calm the dirtier thoughts. She is failing. Badly.

come sail away inbox

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject